Inspiration can come from many different places, none of which I have visited recently. I’ve not had reason to reflect on anything life-changing or earth-shattering this week, so I’ve had time to consider just what goes in to an “epic” piece of writing. What I discovered is that striving for epicness might be the problem. Our society tends to think in terms of greatness. The stuff we read and listen to and talk about is all the epic stuff – the “greatest hits.” We are living in a Best of Fleetwood Mac sort of world where everyone sings like Stevie Nicks and everyone possesses the creativity of Lindsey Buckingham. But what about the Christine McVie songs? Is there not room for a little average, or less than average, in our lives? If everything everyday was perfect, how would we know the difference? Sometimes stuff has to suck, so that we can appreciate when it does not suck. That is why today’s post is going to suck majorly – so that when, eventually, I stumble upon an idea that does not suck, you will all pee your pants with excitement.

It is not as though I avoid inspiration. Several times this week I turned to my two beautiful daughters and said “Why don’t you guys get off your butts and do something interesting so I can write about it?” But, they were not at all cooperative – “we have homework, blah blah blah.” They did suggest that I write about Webkins, which is a major part of their world and has recently become a category in our Microsoft Money. (Mortgage, Food, Utilities, Webkins, Car Payment.) The concept is an interesting one, and certainly worth exploring, but I will save that for a day when I am not talking about not having anything to write about.

I thought, for a nanosecond, about my work life and how interesting it would be once translated to paper. I mean, who wouldn’t want to hear all about sitting in a cube, and sometimes getting out of a cube for as long as an hour to go to meetings and then coming back to the cube. Also sometimes I read emails, and talk on the phone. While it is true that I enjoy my job more than I’ve ever enjoyed any job, it is still a job and no one wants to hear about it – especially my wife.

The other big thing in my life right now is the whole “back to blogging” movement. You have no doubt noticed that I have written more in January than I did all last year. Interestingly enough, I was perusing my copy of “Dave Barry’s Greatest Hits” last night (again with the Greatest Hits) with a highlighter in one hand and, well, the book in the other hand, obviously, studying the fine art of humor writing, or as some might call it, stealing ideas. I noticed that in the first three pieces he talks about writing the articles. I find it a bit cyclical, and somewhat strange, to write about the process of writing about the process of writing. (Not a typo.) Where does it end?

At times I have been known to look outside of my own life for inspiration. There is the whole election thing, which I have written about, but which is so incredibly boring and pointless that even I could not make it funny. I went on a mental journey the other morning imagining the guy in front of me having to scrape the bumper sticker (Obama ’08) off of his car in a few months if Obama does not make the cut. Is he spiteful (“damn Hillary supporters”) or does he just do it absent-mindedly (“boy these persimmons sure taste good”)? Not having ever placed a sticker on any part of my car, I do not know when one decides that the sticker should come off. But they must come off, because you don’t see Dukakis stickers anywhere. I should put a sticker on, just for the experience. I’m thinking of making one that says, “I’m not playing air guitar, I’m practicing,” but I don’t know if it works in all situations.

Of course, the election is not the only news of the world – there is also war, death, destruction and the Super Bowl. I mostly avoid death and football – all of the news channels are blocked and I wouldn’t even know where to go for sports. I do hear some of it – you can’t help but stumble upon this crap on the internet, or at the water cooler. I can’t block either of those. The thing is – I could almost be a news junkie. It’s like reading a book that is completely unpredictable, except that it is real and so real people die. But I find football to be intolerable. If I had to pick, I’d go with death.